Swole

 
One of the best parts of being in an entity as large and diverse as Goonswarm (and by proxy, the CFC), is that you find many like-minded individuals who have a lot in common with you, both in and outside the client. Over the past six months, several special-interest groups have formed based off real-world interests and occupations. Engineers, IT professionals, and Wall Street trading are all examples of professions that have formed social networks within the bloc. We even have an in-house legal council, formed by the surprisingly large amount of lawyers we have in our community. While we do have numerous groups dedicated to career professionals, we also have several others set up for other purposes. We have a social group for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender Goons. Another group was introduced to cater to the female populace within the CFC, as we happen to have a surprisingly large female membership when compared to other groups in EVE. We also have groups setup to cater for specific interests, like the recently introduced SwoleSwarm, dedicated to helping fat Goons shed excessive weight and skinny Goons not look like the weedy nerds they are. Hell, it even got internal press within the last CEO update: The era of being a fat neckbeard – much like the era when we were all lolbertarians – is long over. It takes stamina to drink and party as hard as we do in Reykjavik and Vegas, so you need to lift. Swoleswarm will help you. Join us and compare your 5x5s while complaining about having to count calories. depressed I’ve had my fair share of weight issues in the past. I was a pretty prominent local athlete (‘American Football’ which I know sucks balls in comparison to the likes of ‘real man’ sports like rugby and football) and required a ridiculous calorie intake just maintain my playing weight. I never really got out of that mindset after the organized athletic chapter of my life closed, leading me to constantly gain weight, followed by a healthy diet and extreme exercise to shed off. Over the past ten years my weight has fluctuated from being SWOLE AS FUCK (a quote Blawrf McTggart used to described me in 2012 after a weekend of partying) to your stereotypical fat neckbearded goon. I’d been mentally preparing myself to take the plunge and put the hard work again to get to a healthy weight again so the announcement of Swoleswarm came at a perfect time. The program itself is nearly identical to the one I’ve used before in the past, so I don’t foresee any problems using it knowing it works. Having a strong online supporting community should be beneficial, and having the ability to cheer on people as they motivate you is something I look forward to. It also doesn’t hurt to have people you’ve played with for years in the same boat as you, and hopefully their individual successes will keep me going with the program. Time to put away the Cheetos and Mountain Dew.
Tags: fitness, goons, gsf, hvac, swole

About the author

HVAC Repairman

LIKES: EVE Online, twitter, Payday 2, Marvel Heroes, trolling Xander
DISLIKES: EVE Online, Blawrf McTaggert, people who use the phrase ‘€œcowboy up’

  • Saint

    All the cliches of the online gamer rolled into one webcam selfie. Amazing. Also, this highlights what I’ve bleated from the hilltops repeatedly. Eve is full of great people who treat each other well…but that doesn’t get applied to “strangers” because of the way the game works. People that claim “Eve is full of wankers” generally haven’t tried to be part (or organise) something bigger

  • Kethry Avenger

    I for one am not surprised by there being large numbers of lawyers in the CFC/Goons. Have you read the threads where a change was happening that the greater goon comunity didn’t like?

    • Messiah Complex

      We all enjoy lazy quips. We all like you.

  • HVAC Repairman

    This is what you get when you don’t submit artwork for Xander

    • Saint Mick

      If that’s Xander’s choice of picture, then I for one salute him. Genius.