CZleaks

 

Have you ever wondered exactly why Crossing Zebras is massive quantum leaps and bounds beyond any other EVE media site? What is it the CZ media empire does that makes all others look like the workings of mere, slightly retarded, children? CZleaks is here to offer you a rare glimpse into the advanced workings beneath the polished surface and the sophisticated work ethic of the elite CZ staff, putting all those trillions of ISK to work.

What you see below are excerpts from the CZ Skype channel. It might be difficult to follow due to the high level of discussion and complex topics and is only recommended for advanced readers of above average intellect.

Back in late 2013:

Xander Phoena: Oh by the way cockchops – we pretty much have to record Friday night. To give a chance for the episode to be out there a good 24 hours before Monday.
HVAC Repairman: you should tweet in advance a very special announcement COMING
HVAC Repairman: the tweeters
Xander Phoena: Already have been doing that you bellend
HVAC Repairman: oh not like i read your shit
Xander Phoena: Same right back at you.
Xander Phoena: Dick.
Xander Phoena: I should be charging HVAC for being allowed to write for us not the other way round.
HVAC Repairman: poo poo fart pee
HVAC Repairman: word skills bad

HVAC Repairman: anyone not ratting in an afktar is an idiot
Xander Phoena: link fit pls
Xander Phoena: HVAC
Xander Phoena: YOU DICK
HVAC Repairman: what did i do now
Xander Phoena: On 10/12/2013, at 19:40, Xander Phoena wrote:
> link that afktar fit
HVAC Repairman: god
Xander Phoena: can’t get the staff these days…
HVAC Repairman: im fighting doctor doom atm nerd
Xander Phoena: such a loser
HVAC Repairman: go look it up on the goon wiki
HVAC Repairman: every spy in the game has access so you should too

Xander Phoena: I brought on Forlorn for his brains and skills
Xander Phoena: Sindel for her repartee and good looks
HVAC Repairman: maths is illegal
Xander Phoena: and HVAC so that myself and Jeg wouldn’t look totally outclassed by the other two

More recently:

Niden: Yeah, us second class citizens weren’t invited
Tarek Raimo: NP Xander, Niden had it covered
Xander Phoena: ~poors~
Niden: class war
HVAC Repairman: The war on poors
Niden: you can take our money, you can take our lives, but you’ll never take our freeeeedoooom
Xander Phoena: Kill all poors
Niden: Guillotine the rich
HVAC Repairman: If freedom is going 100 jumps to kill a couple destroyers ill pass
Niden: wow, you know fuck all about ls in that case
Niden: go and shoot some structures, lemming
HVAC Repairman: Why the jealousy m8
Mangala: cant i just gas you all and save me reading this pointless crap over and over now.Its boring.
HVAC Repairman: The structure i just killed cost more than your top ten kills of the week o9
Niden: Yeah, I bet it put up a close fight
HVAC Repairman: Mangina y u hatin m8
Xander Phoena: Shit, Mangala is displeased
Xander Phoena: I guess HVAC has to stop calling you lowsec rejects ‘poors’
Mangala: it was funny the first couple of times, just gets boring now. like parks and rec.
Niden: HE STARTED IT
Xander Phoena: wow
Xander Phoena: Mangala calling HVAC and Niden a bitch
Xander Phoena: boring bitch at that
HVAC Repairman: He just called niden a bitch. Not me
Xander Phoena: He called you a bitch too HVAC.
Xander Phoena: He said you are boring
HVAC Repairman: Bitch if there one thing i aint, its boring

Don’t you feel enlightened? Next time on CZleaks Xander will be explaining the expert use of ‘a bag of dicks’ and the staff will discuss the professional term ‘kiddie pool’.

Stay tuned.

Tags: czleaks

About the author

Niden

12 year EVE veteran, Snuffed Out scumbag, writer, graphic artist, producer, Editor-in-Chief of Crossing Zebras and the second most influential player in EVE, according to EVE Onion.


  • The Mittani

    What was the point of this? A public circle jerk?

    • Seith kali

      Circles don’t have a point, mittens.

    • Kamar Raimo

      It’s the EVE meta-media version of a TEST Alliance SOTA in excerpts.

    • xanderphoena

      It was just supposed to be a nice wee bit of light-hearted, amusing, throwaway content for the weekend. Don’t read too much into it Alex.

      • Niden

        Wasn’t that obvious?

  • Tubrug1

    Wow Ripard Teg will hear about this TORTURE of HVAC.

  • Smokey

    Golf clap, would read again